New Year...New me

So, it's been almost two weeks since I started my diet. I'm hanging in there. My scale isn't necessarily showing me the great numbers that I hoped during my first couple weeks, but slow and steady wins the race, right? The number is lower than it was 11 days ago when I really started, so that's a good thing. Hopefully it will only continue to get lower. My fear is that I won't be able to stick with this. It truly is a change of lifestyle, not just in what I eat.

I have to really think about what I'm going to eat each day ahead of time. With a busy toddler, that is really hard. I'm probably not eating the best things that I could, but I'm eating things that are pretty easy for me to get ready and to prepare. It is working for now, so I will stick with it.

I'm going to tackle my biggest challenge...finding time to work out. I'm going to try to start working out during my lunch break next week a couple days and see how it goes. I'm worried that I will get really smelly and sweaty and that I won't be comfortable for the rest of the afternoon. Watch out afternoon meetings! You might smell me coming! Hopefully I will be able to come up with a system and stick with it. By the time I get off work, I just want to get home and spend a couple hours with Jack before he goes to bed. But, he doesn't go to bed until 8:30 or 9, so that's a little late to start a workout (I'm just exhausted by that time). So, I'm going to try the lunchtime thing. I'm going to start with two days a week next week and see how it goes!

I've made the decision to run a 5K at the end of April, so I'm going to be training for that. I've had the Couch to 5K program on my Ipod for months and months but just haven't done it. So, I'm going to start that now and get prepared. I really want to prove that I can do it! I've never been a runner...I've never enjoyed it. Even when I played field hockey in high school and had to run one or two miles a day at the start of practice, I never enjoyed it (and I was in much better shape back then!). So, we will see how it goes. I'm committing to run the 5K in April. If I hate it, I won't do another one. But, I'm going to prove that I can do it at least once!

More to come!

Writer's Block

I'm supposed to be working on an article right now...but clearly I am not! About five months ago I submitted a proposal for an article to my professional association. It was accepted and I pushed it aside. Well, my deadline is next week and I am no closer to starting in that I was five months ago! Ugh. I honestly hate the topic that I chose and just can't figure out where I want to go with it!

I really need to get my act together and work on it, but I somehow just can't make myself do it. It is the first week of the spring semester at my university, so it's quite busy! Once I finally get Jack into bed, I'm exhausted and don't want to do anything. I am really hoping for a snow day tomorrow so I can get my thoughts together during nap time and hopefully make some progress!

Procrastination is my middle name. What did I say all through grad school? I work best under pressure. Yeah right!

The Hardest Thing

Like many people, I started a diet at the first of the year. It's cliche, but I needed to do it. I look at my beautiful little boy and I know that I need to get healthy for him. Some friends of mine and I started an online support group on Facebook to help each other along. It's definitely been a great thing during this first week.

Losing weight is the hardest thing ever. I will say one thing...I've been the same weight for approximately five years, give or take 10 pounds. When I was pregnant with Jack, I gained 18 pounds, which was right on target. He was nearly eight pounds and I was back in my pre-pregnancy clothes a week after he was born. My problem is losing the weight. But, I need to do it, so I'm working on it.

This week has been rough. The first two days I was hungry ALL THE TIME. OH MY GAAAHH. Get in my belly food!! But, the past two days have been a little better. I decided to do Weight Watchers Online for a few months so I can get a handle on things. It's a lot of work. I plan meals and take lunch and snacks to work. But, it will be okay. I can have anything I want...just in moderation. I get my flex points every week that I can use to have some french fries if I want them...or a milk shake...or a big, juicy, cheeseburger (which is my current craving...hello Red Robin!).

So, tomorrow is our first weigh in. We are weighing in every Friday. It's only been four days since I started, so I don't expect to lose much...but I'm afraid that I won't have lost anything and that I'm going to get frustrated. I'm hoping to have lost a half a pound at least. That would be a start.

My initial goal is to lose 10 pounds. It's attainable and I can see the light at the end of that tunnel. If I were to look at the total amount that I need to lose, it would be completely overwhelming. So, 10 pounds it is. And when I reach that, I will reward myself with a pedicure! And then I will look at another 10 pounds. I hope that by the time Jack's birthday rolls around in a little over five months (how is it possible that I will have a two year old in a little over five months???), I won't be ashamed of the photos that are taken. I don't know how much weight I will have lost by then, but I can guarantee I will at least weigh a little less than I do now!

My little weight loss group all shared photos of ourselves as a "before". So, here are mine...for posterity sake. All I can say is UGH!