Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Three Months

My oh my...where does the time go?!

Jack Ryan, you are three months old today! So, what's new in your world?

You currently wear a size two diaper.

You wear 3 month clothes and some 3-6 month clothes. We are having trouble with clothes for you because you are very long but are not filling the clothes in so they look baggy on you.

You weigh approximately 14 pounds (you haven't been to the doctor since you were two months old). And you are about 24 inches long.

You started completely sleeping through the night in the past couple weeks. We have a night every now and then where you wake up at about 5:30 and decide you want to eat, but otherwise, you are sleeping until almost 7AM. Some days we even have to wake you up!

You go to bed sometime between 8PM and 9PM most nights. Occasionally you are up later, but we are trying to get you into more of a routine.

You love to read books! Your favorites are the baby signs book that has funny pictures and the peek-a-boo book where we lift the flaps and you see pictures of animals. It's so cute to watch you laugh at the pages.

Speaking of laughing, you are starting to laugh more. It is a sound that melts mommy's heart! You laugh pretty hard if we blow on your belly...and even laugh when mommy uses the booger sucker on you! You are the only child mom knows that loves that thing!

You love to sit in your bouncy seat and look at thes lights.

You are also obsessed with fans. You started looking at the mirror in the living room and it took me a few days to realize that you couldn't see the actual fan on the ceiling, so you started watching it in the mirror!

You have started watching tv. It's actually kind of funny because you will crane your neck to see the tv...especially if the Cardinals are playing! Mommy doesn't want you to watch tv, but sometimes it's funny to watch you look at the screen. I'm pretty sure you are just mesmerized by the colors.

You are a very good eater. We started giving you cereal with a spoon and you are doing really well. We have some incidents (yes, mommy dropped the entire bowl into your lap, and sometimes you slap the spoon out of my hand) but for the most part you actually eat it pretty well. We can't wait to see how you react to vegetables next month!

You are eating bottles about every three hours during the day....and you eat about 5 or 6 ounces at a time. We are able to stretch those feedings a little by giving you cereal in the morning and at dinnertime.

You are actually pretty independent and don't like to be held sometimes. You just want to sit in your bouncy seat or swing or even lay on the floor and play.

You have really discovered your voice over the past couple weeks and babble constantly. Daddy and I laugh because sometimes it sounds like you say real words. We have heard "uh oh" "oh yeah" and "no" numerous times. You also sound like you say "mama" all the time. Okay, mostly when you are crying.

You obsessively suck on your thumb. Sometimes, you even suck on both of them at the same time. We think you are starting the teething process, so your hands are always in your mouth. And you drool a lot.

In all, you are the best thing that I have ever done. I love you very much! I can't wait to see the person you are going to become.

I will add pictures tomorrow! My computer is acting up today!

Thursday, August 13, 2009


I am feeling really guilty today. I am having a hard time with the fact that I can't just go and do what I want to do when I want to do it. I can't just drop things and go out with my friends. I can't just go out for dinner and drinks anymore. I think that is so hard for me because none of my friends have babies yet. They can all come and go as they please.

I was so excited because I had planned a night out with all my friends for this Friday night. My former roommate (who was also my maid of honor) lives about four hours away now and she was supposed to come into town and stay with us for the weekend. My other good friends were supposed to all get together tomorrow night and go out to dinner and then out to a few bars. My husband got the night off and is going to stay home with Jack.

Tonight, my out of town friend let me know that her husband was just told that he has to work this weekend, so they aren't coming into town. I'm so upset. I haven't seen her in almost two months and was so looking forward to seeing her. This also means that I can't really drink if we go out because she was going to be my only hope for someone to stay sober to drive me home. I won't drive if I have had anything to drink. So, I'm half tempted to just not go at all. At this point, my two other friends aren't even answering my calls, so maybe they aren't going either (although I talked to both of them yesterday and they were both excited to go out).

But, I'm just so mad at myself because I am resenting my sweet little boy. I love him so much, but sometimes I wish for just a day when I can do what I want to do and not worry about what he needs. Being a parent is hard work, and it is honestly much harder than I ever thought. I feel like such a horrible person for feeling this way. I know there are so many people out there that would give anything for a baby, and here I am complaining about not being able to go out. I should be ashamed of myself.